How your next year can be nothing short of amazing
Strong statement, right?
But yes, it works! And in this article I’ll show you how you can free your head, your heart and your soul step by step from your current situation if the past year wasn’t exactly great.
I know some good ways to get in the mood for a new year. I absorb every kind of impulse and think about how it might suit me and my situation.
What I’ve been doing for a few years now: I write down what I want to change in my life in the next year and what went so well last year that I want to keep. I also write down what material wishes I want to fulfill. This brings clarity and I can fall back on it if I want to reward myself.
Last year I also learned about a method that I think is brilliant and that enables a kind of 360 degree perspective on your life. I first heard about this method from Jeff Walker and was immediately impressed.
You concentrate on the roles you have in your life . You ask yourself:
- What goal or intention do I set for each individual role?
- What steps/measures do I want to implement in the next 12 months to achieve these goals?
We mothers often tend to become so absorbed in our role as mothers that we no longer see anything else. However, this also means that we put all our eggs in one basket – if this basket falls down, then we no longer have any others with which we can bake a good cake (our life).
And the children – even if they are not estranged from our toxic ex – will eventually move out and live their own lives. What then? What life will you lead then?
So: Sit down and think about the roles that you take on in your life and that are dear and dear to you.
My roles
For example, I am:
- Mother (yeah, sure!)
- Wife and (soon) lover
- Dog owner
- Coach and entrepreneur
- Student
- Girlfriend
- Peer (for other self-employed people)
- Doctor-client (no, not a patient!)
- Daughter
- tenant
For each of these roles I set myself an intention: How do I want to live this role in the next year? What is important to me?
Next, I go through what I need to change or keep in order to achieve my intentions.
Of course my child tops the list and that I want to be present for the boy so that he doesn’t just see me working. Which, admittedly, is a big challenge since I don’t have a physical separation between work and private life.
Our dog also demands his rights and needs physical and mental exercise. If I let it slide, I will constantly feel guilty. And a mega chaotic dog.
I have seriously neglected my role as a woman and part of a romantic relationship in recent years, and that will definitely be a focus next year. Of course, I have to jump out of my comfort zone again – it’s of course emotionally safer if I stay at home and don’t even risk encountering a narcissist again. On the other hand, the great, unknown benefit of a fulfilling, equal relationship is just out there.
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In my role as a coach and entrepreneur , I only take a bird’s-eye view in this context – I do my detailed project planning separately and in much more detail.
As a student, I think about what I still want to learn. Which topics do I need to take a closer look at, which ones electrify me? This is also important so that I can plan budgets and reserves for this in good time.
As a friend, I treat my friendships like treasure.
As a peer , I expect myself to network regularly and make and maintain contacts. So I plan to go to conferences and meetups or arrange lunch dates with individual entrepreneurs.
As a doctor’s customer , I see that I go to the usual check-ups, but do not actually become a patient. By eating healthy and leading a healthy lifestyle.
As a daughter , I keep in touch with my parents and remain available if something should happen.
As a tenant , I have to ensure that I maintain and maintain the apartment. This also includes major clearing out activities so that the apartment can “breathe” again.
Do you want to feel confident about managing child hand-offs with your toxic ex?
What are your roles in your life?
There is probably the role as an employee, as a colleague, as a volunteer and so on.
What measures would you like to take today so that next year you can fulfill all of these roles in the way that suits you best?
Mind you: It’s not about what expectations others have of you! For example, it’s not about being a good daughter for the narcissistic mother.
It’s all about what intentions YOU need so that you stay in balance and become strong.
And you can lead a completely fulfilling life.
Your actions
Once you have set your intentions, you take care of the individual measures and steps for the next year. So you could decide at the beginning of the year to call all of your usual doctors and arrange preventive appointments throughout the year. Then it’s already done.
For example, you could also plan to have a fixed date with your girlfriend at least once a month where you can meet.
As an employee, you can think about how you can increase your value in the company. What topic would you like to explore, even if you haven’t had anything to do with it yet? What online courses are there for this? Be sure to check out Udemy if you can’t think of anything.
And what about your life as a woman and lover? Hmm? Would the coming year feel like the right one for you to take a step out into the dating arena? Then you could, for example, set yourself the goal of going out and dating at least one child-free evening a month (and of course you have to make sure that you have dates beforehand!).
I wish you a lot of fun and joy as you plan your next, fantastic year!
I really hope that I was able to give you one or two impulses with this article. Please write to me in the comments below if you have any additions or what your experiences are. I’m happy!
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